Long story short, 12 weeks of maternity leave, followed by 2 months of work, and now I'm back on maternity leave... permanently. What an emotional roller coaster. I was devastated when I had to return to work. Henry was 3 months old and I was terrified. It was a rough two or three weeks. I almost quit more than once, but I promised to give it one month. I'm glad I did because I realized that I did in fact want to be a working Mom. Henry transitioned nicely in daycare and I fell in love with his caregivers. I was finally comfortable. Finally some stability!!! Zac was set to be working on the new Shriner's hospital in STL for the next couple of years. One day he came home from work and told me that he no longer was going to be working on the hospital, but he was being sent to Osage Beach. What!? Where is that??? Lake of the Ozarks, he said. I freaked out. That was way too far. Turns out its only 2 hours from our driveway. Huge bonus, but still too far to commute. Separation with Henry is not an option. Not to mention the fact that we have been separated for almost our entire marriage. So I resigned from my job and we have officially relocated for 14-16 months. I honestly don't know how I feel about all of this. The word balance comes to mind. Although, I had decided I wanted to be a working Mom, I was not happy about the amount of time I was separated from Henry. I dropped him off at daycare at 6:30 AM and didn't pick him up until around 5PM. In short, it felt like his daycare caregivers were raising him. Even though I LOVED his daycare. It broke my heart. We only saw him for a little over an hour in the evening during the work week. That is just not ok. I realize that this is reality for so many families. Ideally, a part time job would bring the best of both worlds, but that is not always an option either. Child care, even part time is astronomical. I feel incredibly fortunate that Zac is able to financially support us so we can all be together. I am enjoying being home all day, but is has certainly been an adjustment. I just hope that I can provide Henry with exactly what he needs. I of course hope that my sanity stays in tact as well. I miss my friends so badly it hurts. I do feel a bit lonely here, but I know that its only temporary and this time with Henry is absolutely priceless. If we are going to be outside of STL for a year or so, this is certainly not a bad place to be. Here are a few pictures from our lake adventure thus far. We haven't had a chance to venture out much. We are in the middle of sleep training (will post about this later) and we're still adjusting. There's a lot to be done around the condo. We finally ordered couches. We are currently sitting on camping chairs. As we speak, I'm typing this post sitting on the floor, my computer is attached to the Ethernet cable. We forgot the wireless router. Ohhhh we forgot so much. Moving sucks, but I better get used to it I guess. I'm learning Zac's job equals travel. Sorry this was so long. Like I said, it has been a while. Hopefully now that I'm not working and will be getting more than 4-5 hours of sleep a night, I will have the energy once again to blog. Please read so I'm not doing this for nothing. Ha!
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